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Contents

  1. 333 ways to ask for a joke
  2. Get more jokes, puns and riddles
  3. 85 Corny Jokes Everyone Will Laugh at to Celebrate National Tell a Joke Day
  4. Great jokes for 3 year olds - Hand Picked Selection

The Redneck worker opens his lunch box and sees a bologna sandwich. If I get another bologna sandwich tomorrow, I'm going to commit suicide". The next day during lunch hour, they are sitting on the same steel beam. The Italian worker opens his lunch box and finds spaghetti and meatballs. Without saying a word he closes the box and throws himself off of the beam and drops twenty floors to his death. The Mexican worker opens his box, finds a burrito, closes the box and jumps to his death.

The Redneck worker opens his box and finds a bologna sandwich, closes the box and jumps to his death. A couple of days later the families of all three workers meet at the cemetery just after the funerals. The Italian worker's wife was crying. The Mexican worker's wife said "I could have fixed my husband a taco or an enchilada, and he would be here with me today". There was a moment of silence while everybody was waiting for the Redneck worker's wife to comment.

What's the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

333 ways to ask for a joke

Ones really heavy and the others a little lighter. Jesus I had this question at the end of a job interview.

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Here's the joke I told I got the job :. Two engineering students were walking across campus when one said, "Where did you get such a great bike? The second engineer replied, "Well, I was walking along yesterday minding my own business when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike.

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She threw the bike to the ground, took off all her clothes and said, "Take what you want. The first engineer nodded approvingly, "Good choice; the clothes probably wouldn't have fit. It took me a really fucking long time to realize that the person was not speaking to jesus about his job interview where engineers throw bikes down and tops off.

Get more jokes, puns and riddles

So a farmer wakes up one morning and looks out the window and sees his prize rooster laying in the middle of the barnyard stiff as a board with buzzards circling overhead. With his only rooster dead, he decides to go to the market to buy a new rooster. The farmer is absolutely shocked at this price, but the seller tells him "This is the most amazing rooster you'll ever see. The farmer realizes that this is too good of a deal to pass up, so he decides to buy the rooster. When he brings it home, he sets it down in the barnyard and tells the rooster "Listen here.

I have a lot of hens, but there is no hurry. My last rooster worked himself too hard and died. So just take it easy and do your thing".

85 Corny Jokes Everyone Will Laugh at to Celebrate National Tell a Joke Day

The rooster is off like a bullet and he runs to the hen house and fucks every single hen. He dashes to the pond and fucks all the ducks. He's just a blur around the farmyard fucking every animal he can. The farmer is in awe at the rooster and thinks "Wow, this really is the most amazing rooster ever! The next morning, he wakes up and sees the rooster laying in the middle of the barnyard, stiff as a board, with buzzards circling over head. I told you to take it easy!

The rooster opens one eye and points at the buzzards and whispers "Shhh, They're getting closer! A farmer and his dog are herding sheep. They finish and his dog says "I counted 40 sheep". The farmer replies, "That's odd I only got 37". The dog replies "I rounded them up". Q: How do you keep an elephant from charging? Take away her credit card!

So he could hide in the crayon box!


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By the footprints in the butter! Q: What is the difference between elephants and grapes? Grapes are purple. To get to the other slide! A cold! A clock! Q: What do you call a dog that can tell time? A watch dog! The outside! The snow!

Because her students were so bright! Q: How did Benjamin Franklin feel when he discovered electricity? Because they use honeycombs! Q: What do you call a flower that runs on electricity? A power plant! Because she was a little horse! Q: Why did the cookie go to the nurse? Because he felt crummy! A mushroom! Q: What has four wheels and flies?

Q: How do you keep a bull from charging? Take away its credit card! Q: What did one plate say to the other? Dinner is on me! Q: How do you make a lemon drop? Just let go of it! Q: Why did the boy throw his clock out the window? Because he wanted to see time fly! Q: What does an evil hen lay? Deviled eggs! Q: Which hand is better to write with? Q: What did the traffic light say to the truck? Q: What did the frog order for lunch? A burger and a diet croak! Q: Why did the teddy bear not want any dessert?

Because she was stuffed! A walk. Q: Why should you never trust a pig with a secret? Q: What do cows order from?

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Great jokes for 3 year olds - Hand Picked Selection

Q: What kind of haircuts do bees get? Q: How can you tell if someone is a good farmer? He is outstanding in his field! Q: What do you call a man with a shovel? Q: How do mountains stay warm in winter?


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Because then it would be a foot! A corn field. Q: What do you call the horse that lives next door? Your neighbor! Keep reading funny kids jokes! Try 50 Funny Dad Jokes Have a joke to add?